


turn your gaze upon this wretched braid

by Demi_Fae



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: Crack, Hair Braiding, Hair Kink, Hair-pulling, M/M, The Author Regrets Everything, and a braidjob, every day i die more inside, for living padawan braids, oh god be ready
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-30
Updated: 2020-07-30
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:48:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25099417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Demi_Fae/pseuds/Demi_Fae
Summary: Obi-Wan sighed and sat down next to Anakin on the couch in their dorms. He shifted as he got comfortable, settling into the spread leg position he favored.Anakin's eyes shifted downward, toward where his master's hidden schlong sat. Anakin wondered briefly if the urban legend about braid thickness and dong thickness was true."Anakin, I can't help if you don't tell me what's wrong." Obi-Wan shifted again, and his long hair swung around his face. Anakin's face flushed red as the berries on Naboo as his own prehensile plait grew more interested.-Padawan braids are semi-sentient. Anakin gives a braidjob.
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi/Anakin Skywalker
Comments: 55
Kudos: 63





	turn your gaze upon this wretched braid

**Author's Note:**

> To those that inspired this: You know what you caused  
> To those who didn't talk about this and clicked on it anyway: I am so sorry for what you are about to read, but you chose this. 
> 
> I opened up my doc and started crying when I reread it, but I was determined to finish... and this is the product.

"Anakin, are you even paying attention?" Obi-Wan frowned. His long hair hung freely around his shoulders, braid swinging slightly beside his arm. Anakin's own braid twitched in interest as it spied the swinging strands. 

Anakin gulped as he tried to control his reaction. "Of course, master!" They could both tell that he was lying.

Obi-Wan crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow. "Oh, really? What were we discussing, then?" 

Anakin gulped and swivled his eyes around desperately, looking for any hint that could help him. "We were... talking about.... Hoth!" He exclaimed.

Obi-Wan sighed and sat down next to Anakin on the couch in their dorms. He shifted as he got comfortable, settling into the spread leg position he favored. Anakin's eyes shifted downward, toward where his master's hidden schlong sat. Anakin wondered briefly if the urban legend about braid thickness and dong thickness was true. 

"Anakin, I can't help if you don't tell me what's wrong." Obi-Wan shifted again, and brushed his hair back from his face. Anakin's face flushed red as the berries on Naboo as his own prehensile plait grew more interested. 

"No, Master, its nothing, I swear-" Anakin stuttered as he jumped up from the couch, intending to back away into his rooms. 

It seemed the Force had different ideas as when Anakin jumped up he lost his balance. Trying to keep himself from falling, Anakin twisted, intending to steady himself on Obi-Wan's shoulder. Obi-Wan had already reached around to grab at Anakin's shoulder, unintentionally threading through his hair instead. Anakin froze as Obi-Wan's finger grazed the sensitive nerves in his braid, and he tripped over one of Obi-Wan's legs as blood flooded down to his nether regions.

The hand in his hair tightened reflexively to try and slow him down, yanking Anakin’s head back. Anakin groaned at the pounding feeling, but was thankful that it seemed he landed on something soft. He shifted to relieve the pressure on his back, but froze as Obi-Wan’s hand tightened in his hair. Anakin finally opened his eyes to see that he sat between Obi-Wan's legs, his mouth open and resting on his master's pelvis, over his growing girth. A little drool had already escaped his mouth and wetted the area, and Anakin couldn’t help but stick out his tongue to prod his master’s honkin donkin doodle. 

“Anakin-” Obi-Wan started, and then moaned. Anakin’s braid prodded at his master’s clothes, pushing the layers out of the way so that there was only Obi-Wan’s underclothes and leggings in between Anakin and his prize. 

“Master, please,” Anakin begged. Obi-Wan light stroked Anakin’s braid, and he let out a soft noise at the touch. Desperation flooded the bond, and Anakin couldn’t let this go as he felt the same stirrings right underneath him. “Please!” 

Something in Obi-Wan snapped, and Anakin could feel that he’d won. “Do you want to suck me off?” Obi-Wan asked. “Do you want to be a good boy and put your lips around my honka badonka, let me use you until I fripquidate in your mouth?” 

“Yes!” Anakin exclaimed, muffled as he desperately tried to suck Obi-Wan into his mouth through the layers like a Dirt Devil Power Express Vacuum Cleaner™.

“Padawan, lean back,” Obi-Wan commanded with a rough voice. 

“What? Why!” Anakin demanded. 

“Do you actually want your mouth around my ding a ling, or just keep soaking my clothes?” He asked with a pointed eyebrow. 

Anakin froze and leaned back just enough for Obi-Wan to push his leggings down to his thighs. Anakin nearly froze at the sight of his master’s hunka bunka honka donka bonka dinga donga linga longa- It was the biggest piece of meat he’d ever seen. And Anakin would know- he watched a lot of porn. 

His braid didn’t stop for a second, however, yanking him forward. It wrapped around the base of Obi-Wan's hunka bunka, then slid up to wrap around the rest of his ding a ling and tickled the tip. The braid slowly started to work Obi-Wan up to full hardness, Anakin rubbing his cheek along the luscious length. Both his cheek and hair became wet with prefripquid. Anakin stuck his tongue out to tease the slit and taste the leak. 

There was something so distinctly Obi-Wan about it that he couldn’t help but moan. His master rubbing his braid didn’t help. Anakin kept licking back and forth, determined to taste as much of it as possible. 

When Obi-Wan seemed ready to burst like a broken dam and spill his saltiness, wrecking Anakin’s picturesque village below, Anakin opened his mouth to ready himself for the three-point shot that was about to be made. 

It seemed that Obi-Wan had different ideas, however, because he gripped at his own fripper in such a way to stop it from ‘quidating all over the place. 

“No, I want to midichlori-come inside your mouth,” Obi-Wan growled, with his own braid reaching towards Anakin’s. They met gratefully, weaving around and through each other. The stimulation was almost too much as they tangled into a disgusting knot that would take far too much time to undo later. 

Anakin wrapped his plush lips around his master's meaty man yum yum. It tasted meaty, and yummy. Anakin nearly choked on Obi-Wan's honka donka dinga donga because his braid yanked him forward, causing him to swallow all of Obi-Wan's sausage at once. 

Drool leaked out of Anakin's mouth as he enthusiastically sucked on Obi-Wan's schlang dang noodle like a nerf calf on their mother's mammaries. The big ding dong hurt his jaw, but Anakin wouldn’t stop now. Shlurping noises echoed around the room in time with Obi-Wan’s noises above him. 

The stimulation was too much to hold back from orgasm any longer. Obi-Wan let his seed spill into Anakin’s mouth, and Anakin swallowed all of it like a snake horking down an egg. The feelings from his braid entangled with Obi-Wan’s, and Obi-Wan’s pleasure through their bond tipped Anakin over the edge as well, and his high midichlori-cum count sang in his undertunics.

Anakin pulled off of his master’s limp straw and looked up into his seeing orbs. “Well, I hope you’re not thinking about Hoth anymore,” his master said. 

Anakin rolled his eyes and looked back down at Obi-Wan’s honka donka badonka. “Not really,” he said with a smirk, thinking about all the different ways they could frip in the coming days. 

**Author's Note:**

> I hate hate hate how half of this is written so seriously, and then "Obi-Wan's honka badonka big dang dinga donga linga longa" will just punch you in the face
> 
> Other notes about this au:  
> -Knights don't cut their braid, and generally Jedi just... grow out their hair  
> -The longer the braid is, the less sensitive it is- which means if its cut, its very sensitive  
> -Of course, the more sensitive you are, the more sensitive it is too  
> -So basically, Anakin (getting into a lot of trouble in general, gets his braid cut all the time) n u t s in his pants a lot lmao  
> -Yoda 100% has a Rapunzel-length braid, and he wears it in an updo  
> -Grevious keeps the braids of the Jedi he's killed  
> -Please, imagine Grevious in a braid wig. Do it for me  
> -Sith have a legend that eating another's braid (Sith or Jedi) will give you extra power  
> -Imagine Anakin frying the younglings' braids on his lightsaber to try and eat hair  
> -Imagine Sidious horking down some random Jedi's braid  
> -its disgustang  
> -Just: Down the hatch we goooooooooo!
> 
> You can come yell at me on tumblr at [rynae-reblogs,](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/rynae-reblogs) and god would I deserve it

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [podfic: turn your gaze upon this wretched braid by demi_fae](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25814950) by [Purely_a_trashcan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Purely_a_trashcan/pseuds/Purely_a_trashcan)




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